Show me the meaning
by ADangerousMuteLunatic
Summary: Kai spends Christmas alone. Despite trying to act like it doesn't matter, he can't help but wish he wasn't always alone. Max's looking forward to spending Christmas with his parents, is there room for a certain Hiwatari at the table? KaiMax friendship
1. The one time of year

**Show me the meaning**

**By EpitomeOfMisery**

**Chapter I: The one time of year**

It was that time of year once again. Where the streets and houses were filled and decorated with colourful lights and sparkly decorations. Everywhere glowed like it had been sprinkled with fairy dust and there were smiles all round.

The shops were packed with people buying food and decorations and piles of presents.

With all these smiling faces, no one noticed the lone figure that felt the complete opposite of everyone around him.

The wind was strong and light snow fell all around. It was just starting to get dark but the streets were still packed with people, laughing, carol singing, children playing and running about, everyone having a good time.

Crimson eyes watched the people with interest. The way their eyes lit up with joy as they talked about this wonderful time of the year. Though intelligent, he could not understand why all these people were so happy. Why did everyone smile so much over this concept called 'Christmas'.

He knew the date of it, the twenty fifth of December. He understood why it was celebrated, but he didn't get why it made everyone so happy.

He thought back to his previous Christmas experiences. In the abbey they acted like Christmas didn't exist and it was just another normal day of training and harsh beatings. With his Grandfather it was a special day, but in a happy way. His Grandfather would lecture him, telling him if he dared to do anything remotely fun on Christmas he would punish him. He punished him anyway on Christmas day, saying it was his special present.

Kai swung his legs casually over the edge of the tree branch he sat on. From up here he could watch all the people down below without being noticed.

The other day he had been standing outside one of the big stores, just watching all the people come in and out. A young woman with a little girl stopped and asked him if he was okay. He had nodded, but the woman didn't look convinced. She asked him if he was lost. He shook his head, looking at the little blonde girl clutching a toy reindeer. The woman asked him what his parents were getting him for Christmas, he said he didn't have parents. The woman gave him a sympathetic look and told him she was very sorry, then she walked on.

He didn't know what had possessed him to stand outside the store like that. He just felt like watching everyone buy presents, maybe… maybe he was trying to imagine that he was going to get presents like that.

Not likely.

He'd never received a Christmas present in his life.

And it wasn't likely that he ever would.

It was five days before Christmas, the twentieth of December. The nights were now very cold and it was nearly dark.

He swiftly jumped off the branch, landing skilfully on the snow covered floor. Turning on his heel he made his way home.

Well back to what he had made like a home.

He pushed the old door open, stepping inside and kicking a few old cans out of the way. There wasn't a proper carpet, just a roughly cut blue rug that he had laid down as carpet. His 'home' was an old corner shop. It was abandoned after it caught fire and hadn't been done up again. There was no furniture inside, only a few piles of odd wood and bits lining the burnt walls. The shop was very small, just bigger than the size of an average living room, though the piles of burnt materials took up a lot of space so the floor space was even more limited.

He sat down on the old mattress he used as a bed. There was a thin navy blanket on top and an old pillow, both of which he'd found dumped at the side of a road. He had a three legged stool that he used like a little table and he'd tied a few more blankets to opposite piles of old wood to make a sort of tent over his head, as the roof leaked badly.

These were certainly not ideal living conditions, but it was all he had.

There was no one he could really turn to for help. He knew he could go to social services but he didn't want anyone snooping into his past and asking questions. It was just too much.

Lying back on the old mattress he put Dranzer beside him. His only companion. She made him feel safe through all the cold nights alone.

He sat up again and crawled over to the crumbling cardboard box he used to store the few odd bits of food he had. He chewed thoughtfully on a red apple, his eyes fixed on a little display before him.

In a little area of floor space he had spare he had set up a little tree in a pot of mud. It was a rough fir tree that was quite bare and dry, it was no taller than the seat of a chair and looked more like fir branch than a whole tree.

Still, it was the only little bit of Christmas he had. He'd found some tinsel that a shop had put outside for decoration and swiped it, it obviously wasn't a big loss as there were several new bits out then next day and vandals always tore it down anyway. The one piece glittery red tinsel wound right round the whole tree, giving the dull green a little life. On top was a yellow paper star he'd made himself.

There were, of course, no presents under the tree. Who would give him any presents anyway?

He spent Christmas alone.

**A/N: **

**This is just a random idea that popped into my head. More on the real plot next chapter. I'm really bored so it will probably be up in about an hour. Please review and tell me what you think. **


	2. Christmas Lights

**Show me the meaning**

**By EpitomeOfMisery**

** Chapter II: Christmas lights**

Max reached out for the mayonnaise bottle and squirted it over his bowl of noodles, smiling at his father opposite him.

"So Max, excited about Christmas?" Mr Tate asked.

"You bet. I can't wait. Especially since mum is coming home tomorrow, I'm so glad she comes to see us at Christmas." Max replied, spooning noodles into his mouth.

"I am too, Maxy. So what are all your friends doing for Christmas?" His father said.

Max put down his chopsticks, wiping his mouth. "Well, Tyson's staying at home with his Grandpa and Hiro, Ray's going back to his village for a while with the White Tigers, Kenny's at home and so is Hillary."

"What about that mysterious lad, Kai?"

Max blinked. "Oh, I don't know, actually. He hasn't said a thing about what he's doing for Christmas." A thoughtful look crossed his face. "I wonder who he's spending it with? His Grandfather's in jail and he doesn't have any other family that we know about."

"I'm sure there's someone there for him." Mr Tate said, noticing Max's saddened expression.

"Yeah." Max muttered. "You're right, dad."

It was a cold night and it was snowing even more. Kai pulled his thin blanket right up and over him, curling up against the icy winds that wormed their way into his so-called home.

Dranzer glowed a warm red, warming him so he managed to drift off into a light sleep.

Max sat at the desk by the window in his bedroom, staring out thoughtfully. His eyes shifted to the big picture on his wall, the one of all the G revolutions. He stared at the tall figure of Kai, his arms folded, he stood slightly away from the others, looking a little detached.

He remembered what his father had said, that he was sure there was someone there for him. But Max couldn't help thinking who. Christmas was a time to spend with family, but what family did Kai have?

He had no one.

_What if he's spending Christmas alone? _Max thought. He found the thought so sad he started thinking that it couldn't be true. No one can be alone on Christmas.

He would see Kai tomorrow morning, they had all planned to meet up at Tyson's house. Then Max was going to go and meet his mum at the airport. He'd ask Kai tomorrow what his Christmas plans were.

Sighing, he stood up and got ready for bed.

The morning of the twenty first of December was cold and windy. When the rest of the team arrived at Tyson's house they found him and Daichi not even up yet.

"TYSON! DAICHI! GET UP! INCASE YOU HAVEN'T NOTICED YOU HAVE GUESTS!" Hillary yelled, successfully waking both boys up.

"What… oh, hi guys, what's up?" Tyson mumbled, still half asleep.

"Tyson, we arranged to meet here at ten. It's not very good hospitality for your guests to arrive while you are still sleeping." Hillary lectured.

"Okay, okay, sorry. I'm up already."

"You're such a lazy pig, Tyson." Daichi grinned.

"HEY! You were sleeping too!" Tyson yelled, raising his fist in anger.

"Tyson, stop yelling and get dressed!" Hillary barked, scaring them both so much they were dressed in ten seconds.

"Right." Kenny said. "Now we're all up and dressed, what shall we do?"

"I thought maybe we could play some Christmas games." Max suggested. "Or make Christmas cards to send to all the other teams."

"That sounds like a cool idea to me!" Tyson said as the others, minus Kai, nodded.

Tyson got out a load of coloured paper, glue and scissors from the cupboard and they all started cutting and sticking.

Kai sat silently away from everyone, of course not joining in the fun. Max glanced at him with a slightly concerned expression. He stood up and made his way over to the anti-social Russian.

"Hey Kai."

Kai opened an eye at the American. "Hn."

"Don't you want to make Christmas cards with us?" Max asked.

"Not really. What's the point?" Kai replied, closing his eyes again.

"Well there's more thought in it if you send homemade Christmas cards and most of all its fun." Max tried.

"Well sorry, but I don't do Christmas cards."

Max raised a hand to his blond head. "Oh… well you can help me make mine if you like."

Kai blinked at him. _What's the point? It's not like anyone sends me anything for Christmas. _He thought, turning away.

"Hey Max, leave the sourpuss alone. He's too scared to have fun." Tyson yelled over.

Max cast a last glance at the stoic blader before slowly walking back and joining the others.

Kai watched him leave with a thoughtful expression. Max was even more cheerful and happy at Christmas, they all were, they were all so excited.

He told himself he didn't care. He was used to spending Christmas alone. It didn't matter. It didn't. It didn't. It didn't….

But it did.

He did care.

Sighing he pulled himself to his feet and left the Dojo.

"Huh?" Max blinked as he heard the door slide closed. He turned to face the wooden exit before turning his gaze to where the Russian teen previously sat. "…Kai?"

Max stood up, heading toward the door.

Tyson looked up. "Hey Maxy, where you going, buddy?"

Max stopped, realising he'd just got up without a reason. "Oh… just to the bathroom." He lied, following Kai out the door.

The others shrugged and went back to what they were doing.

Max ran up the path and made it to the entrance to the dojo grounds. He looked right and left but saw no sign of Kai. Sighing, he turned on his heel and headed back inside.

Kai crawled back into his 'house', pulling with him a white carrier bag. He knelt up, tipping the carrier bag upside down and emptying the contents onto the dusty floor.

He couldn't believe his luck on what he had found. Well most people would not consider themselves lucky in Kai's place, but to Kai it was luck. He'd come across a string of Christmas lights someone had chucked in a dumpster, just because a couple of bulbs had burnt out. He'd stuffed them into the carrier bag along with a few small items of food he'd brought with a little loose change he'd managed to collect. **(A/N: I don't mean to make Kai sound like a beggar or anything, because Kai is definitely not a beggar, just that he doesn't have much going for him.)**

He had a small supply of electricity he'd wired himself from the shop next door. He linked a single extension cord to their electricity box and trailed it back to his 'home'. He had one plug socket and he sacrificed it for a string of old Christmas lights.

Kai draped them round the walls as far as they would stretch and plugged the socket in. Little coloured lights danced all around him. A small smile crept onto the young boy's face.

**I know I said I'd have this up in an hour, and well, I had it finished and ready to put up in an hour… but my _lovely _laptop decided to be _oh so kind _and freeze and delete the file. So I had to type it out all over again.  **


	3. Facing the world alone

**Show me the meaning**

** By EpitomeOfMisery**

**Chapter III: Facing the world alone**

Green, orange, blue, red, green, orange, blue, red, green, orange… The string of Christmas lights kept up the same pattern, not one flashing out of time beside those which didn't work. The warm colour reflected in cold crimson eyes, making the twin orbs look even more unearthly.

The sun was just starting to set outside and it was snowing lightly. In just under an hour the ice cold winds would once again freeze the stoic Russian for another night.

…_Dranzer. _Kai spoke to the phoenix in his mind.

_Yes master._

Kai sat silently for a moment. _…What are my team doing? _

_They are all still at Tyson's house, master. They have finished their earlier activity and are now making paper snowflakes. _The loyal fire bird replied.

Kai nodded slowly. _Have they noticed I'm gone?_

_I do not think so, master. _

Kai looked down. _Good. _He said with determination.

_Kai, please. I know you well. Do not try to hide your feelings from me, I can sense what you feel deep down. _Dranzer said quietly. _I know it really does bother you. _

_No it doesn't. I'm fine. _

_Master, they care for you. You're not alone, you have friends. And you will always have me. _

Kai's eyes narrowed. _I don't care. They don't notice whether I'm there or not. It doesn't matter to me. It doesn't. _

_But it does, master. You can go to them for help. _Dranzer said.

_I don't need help. They wouldn't help anyway. I'm fine on my own. _Kai argued.

He felt Dranzer glow in his mind and his body relaxed at the heat she gave him. It was the only thing that had ever made him feel safe.

…_Dranzer. I'm fine, really. _

_Kai, I know you are upset about Christmas. _

_I don't care about Christmas. It's just another day to me. _

_Your surroundings say otherwise. _Dranzer defended.

Kai looked up at the decorations he'd hung. _Even so. I don't mind spending Christmas alone. _

Dranzer sighed at her master's stubbornness. _If you say so, master. _

Kai lay down on his old mattress, deciding to go to bed early. As he closed his eyes he whispered to his bit-beast. "…I don't care if I'm alone." He said it with determination, but as the words left his mouth a pale hand slipped out from under the covers and pulled his blade to him, clutching Dranzer as if she were his lifeline.

"Mum!" Max cried, running through the crowded airport.

"My little Max." Judy smiled, hugging her son as he ran up to her.

"I missed you so much, mum. I've been counting the days till you came home." Max beamed, standing back as his father caught up.

"Aw, you're sweet, Max. Shall we get home where it's warm." Judy suggested. "And there might be a special present for you in this bag." She winked at the grinning blonde, tapping her suitcase.

"For me? Great! I've got so much to tell you!" Max said.

Judy smiled brightly. "Tell me on the way home. C'mon let's go."

Max stood in the middle of his parents, talking endlessly about everything that had happened to him in the past few weeks and how much he was looking forward to Christmas and how much he had missed his mum and so on.

Kai woke up at six am the next morning. It was still freezing and he was instantly alerted to the cold wind.

He outstretched his fingers and blinked at the red marks his blade had imprinted from how tightly he had been holding it in his sleep. Dranzer glowed brightly in greeting.

_Good morning. _Dranzer said.

_Whatever. _Kai replied, pulling himself to his feet. He headed outside to practice, launching Dranzer onto the thin ice that coated the roads.

Kai frowned as his blade skidded and slipped on the ice. _I don't have to put up with this. _He thought. "Dranzer, BLAZING GIG!"

Dranzer skidded back before charging forward in a burst of blue flames, melting the surrounding ice with the intense heat. Dranzer circled her master, sending the warmth up his body.

Kai sat down on the cold ground, calling Dranzer to him. He picked the blade up as it stopped before him, subconsciously squeezing it tightly. He lay back on the snow, staring at the sky. It was white, yet dark as the snow fell lightly around him, slowly recovering the wet concrete Dranzer's heat had cleared.

The wet snow soaked into his back and the concrete was hard and uncomfortable, yet he still did not move. His eyes closed and he lay there, not moving, just thinking. The wind blew his hair around but his body stayed still. He was frozen, the cold pierced him and paled his skin. It stung, but at the same time it numbed him and took the pain away. He felt sort of… calm. At peace.

Several minutes later, his forehead twitched as the cold snow fell onto his face. Reluctantly he opened his eyes, staring once again at the sky. It was slightly lighter than before and by now half six.

Another cold gust of wind swept at him. Sighing he pushed himself to sit up, shaking his slightly damp hair free of snowflakes. His body was stiff to move and there were even small bits of ice between his fingers.

Standing on weak limbs he kept Dranzer clutched tightly in the palm of his hand, never wanting to let her go.

He ignored the stiffness of his joints and walked up the road and on. There was no one around, as expected at just after half six on a cold December morning. He was glad, he hated to be surrounded with bustling groups of people with barely any room to breathe. Yet still… he wished _someone_ was there, with him.

_I'm here, master. _Dranzer spoke to him.

Kai clutched the blade even tighter. _I know… Thank you._

Max opened his eyes and looked at the illuminated alarm clock on his bedside table. The digits read 7:39am. He sat up and stretched, swinging his legs out of bed and heading into the other room for breakfast.

"Morning Max." Judy greeted, standing at the stove, cooking pancakes.

"Hi mum. Ummm pancakes, my favourite." Max drooled, sitting at the table. "Hey, where's dad?"

"Downstairs, opening up the shop. It's the last day before we're closed for Christmas, so it's going to be busy."

"Oh yeah, I remember the rush last year." Max agreed.

Judy smiled, placing a plate of pancakes in front of her son. "Dig in."

"Great." Max said, reaching for the syrup.

At that moment Mr Tate came up the stairs. "Right, all ready to be opened at eight. Until then, I'm having breakfast." He said, sitting down next to Judy and placing the post on the table. "I think there are a few cards in there for you, Max."

"Oh wow." Max said, reaching out and grabbing the pile of envelopes. He sorted through them, separating the ones with his name.

Max arranged the cards on the windowsill, there were eight in total. One from Tyson, another from Kenny and Hillary, one from Ray, one from Daichi with a teddy bear on the front, two from different sets of Grandparents, both with money in and two more from other relatives.

His sea blue eyes looked all the cards over. There wasn't one from Kai. He had sent cards back to all his friends, except Kai, as no one seemed to know where Kai lived. Even Mr Dickenson wasn't too sure. His records were very vague and the information on Kai's personal life was limited.

Max wandered over to the seat by the window, gazing out through the glass. It looked pretty as everywhere was white and sparkly and it seemed to shine in the light.

Max straightened up as he thought he saw something. He blinked and looked over the street below. His eyes stopped on a tall figure over the road, kneeling down in a snow covered driveway.

"Hey Mum," Max called. "Can I go out for a little while?"

"Where on earth are you going to go in this weather? I thought you said Tyson was busy today?" Mr Tate replied.

"Yeah, he is. But I'm not going to Tyson's. I just want to go see something across the road." Max explained, pointing out the window.

"_What _across the road?" Judy asked, standing next to her son.

Max gestured toward the figure. "I think that's Kai. I want to go and talk to him, if it is." He slid back of the window seat. "I'll come straight back if it isn't."

"Well okay, then. See if he wants to come in for a while, it can't be very warm out there." Judy glanced out the window. "Does he live far from here?"

"No one seems to know, mum." Max said, reaching for his coat. "You know Kai, he's a mystery."

"He certainly doesn't give much away, does he?" Max's dad agreed. "Yes, invite him in, Max."

"I will. Kai's never been round before, unlike the others." Max headed toward the door. "Bye, I'll be back in a while."

"Try not to get too cold." Judy called as the door closed.

Max ran down the stairs and pushed the door to the shop open, having to force it against the wind. He looked both ways before crossing the street and headed toward the person.

A smile spread across his face as his thoughts were confirmed and it indeed was Kai. "Hey, KAI!" He called, running up the road.

Kai's headshot up and the cat he was feeding turned and ran, jumping over the fence and out of sight. Kai stood up and turned, only to see Max coming down the road.

"Hi Kai." Max greeted, skidding to a stop before the taller blader. "How are you? What are you doing way out here in this weather? Shouldn't you be at home getting ready for Christmas?"

Kai just blinked at him, not answering any of the blonde's questions.

Max smiled, used to Kai giving everyone, including him, the silent treatment. "So Kai, my house is just there, we live above the hobby shop my dad owns, do you want to come in?"

Kai stayed silent for a minute. "I really shouldn't." He said eventually.

"No really, it's fine. My mum and dad won't mind, we love having company."

"Well, I don't know." Kai replied, looking away.

Max tugged at his arm. "Please Kai, you can come and see our huge Christmas tree."

Kai studied Max's happy face carefully. _He looks so excited, just at the mention of the word. _He opened his mouth to speak but Max cut him off.

"And we've got lots of other decorations up. Me and dad spent hours getting them down from the loft and putting them up in the shop and our house. Please come and see."

"Well…" Kai began.

"Great! Come on." Max said in an overly cheery voice, pulling him over the road and into the front door of the shop.

Kai pulled his arm out of Max's grip, instead walking just behind him.

"Heh, sorry." Max laughed sheepishly, stopping in the middle of the shop, realizing he'd been a bit too forceful. It was then that he realised what Kai was wearing. It was only his usual attire with the short sleeved jacket. "How come you were out like that, Kai? You must have been freezing. It's nearly zero degrees out there, y'know."

"You point being?" Kai said rashly.

"Well, I didn't mean that you're odd or anything. I'm just saying its really cold out there and you'd be a lot warmer if you wore a jumper or a coat or something." Max explained, turning and starting walking again.

Kai followed with his hands in his pockets.

Once they got to the top of the stairs, Max opened the door and let them both in. "I'm back. And I brought Kai with me."

Judy came up to them. "There you are, Max. I'm glad you weren't out there too long." She turned to Kai. "Hello Kai, how are you?"

"Fine." Kai mumbled.

Judy smiled, just like Max. "Good, good. Come in." She gestured him into the apartment.

"Hey Kai, look at our Christmas tree, it's huge isn't it?" Max said, pointing towards a large, dark green tree smothered in tinsel, baubles, flashing lights and with a gold star on top. "I bet your isn't that big." Max said.

_Not even as tall as the bottom branch. _Kai thought, but just shook his head.

Max knelt down next to the tree. "I've got loads of presents! I can't wait to open all of them! Dad's brought me loads of new Beyblade parts and a new launcher and loads of other stuff." He stood back up next to Kai. "Do you know what you're getting for Christmas?"

Kai just shrugged.

Max carried on rambling about how many presents he was getting until Judy stopped him.

"I know you're excited, Max, but we've heard quite enough about what you're getting for Christmas." Judy laughed.

Max raised a hand sheepishly to his blonde head. "Heh, sorry. Just excited, that's all."

"Yeah." Kai muttered. "I really should be going."

"Oh come on, Kai. You can stay a bit longer." Max protested.

"I don't think so." Kai said, starting to head toward the door.

Max ran after him. "Hey Kai, why don't I walk back to your place with you?"

Kai's eyes widened, suddenly fearful. "No, that's not a good idea."

"Why not? Please Kai, you don't always have to go everywhere on your own."

Judy stood beside Max. "So Kai, who are you living with at the moment?"

Kai shrugged.

Judy gave him a confused look. "Are you going to any family for Christmas?"

"Don't have any to go to." Kai said quietly, looking away.

"Oh, I'm sorry." Judy apologized.

"Don't be."

Max blinked at Kai. "So what are you doing for Christmas?"

Kai shrugged again.

"Where _are _you living, Kai?" Max asked.

Kai shrugged yet again.

"How long have you been there?"

Kai glanced at him. "A while." He said vaguely.

Max smiled, trying to be cheerful. "What's the address? I want to send you a Christmas card."

Kai looked around longingly. "I've got to go." He said, turning on his heel and leaving, completely ignoring the blonde's question.

"But Kai! Wait! What's the rush?!" Max called, running forward to try and catch Kai up, only to have the door closed in his face.

"What happened there?" Judy asked, totally confused, just as Max was.

"I don't know. But I'm going to find out." Max announced, heading out the door and running after Kai.

**A/N: I made this chapter extra long as a (late) Christmas present to all my wonderful reviewers! Hope you enjoyed it and please review otherwise I won't update! **


	4. Welcome home

**Show me the meaning**

** By EpitomeOfMisery**

** Chapter IV: Welcome home**

"Kai! Kai?!" Max called, running up yet another long street. He sighed, Kai was nowhere insight. "He can't have disappeared _that _quickly." Max muttered to himself.

Max turned on his heel and headed back down the street, kicking a stone aside in frustration. He watched it as it bounced along the ground and hit the wall of the old burnt down corner shop. He was about to walk back home when something drew him in the direction of that shop.

He remembered back to when the shop first burnt down. The sirens could be heard all the way from his house.

Standing in front of the crumbling red door, he tapped it with his fingers. The hinges creaked and the door swayed slightly.

Max looked around him, checking there was no one about. He knew he shouldn't be going into a burnt, falling down shop, it was unsafe and not supposed to be touched. Yet somehow something made him go in the door.

He treaded cautiously round a few shards of broken glass, his trainers kicking up dust from the floor.

It was unearthly silent. Everything was still.

Max jumped as the door opened behind him. He spun around, only to come face to face with, "…Kai!"

Kai's eyes narrowed. "Max." He snapped. "What are you doing here?"

"I was… uh, just… Wait." He paused. "What are _you _doing here?"

"I…" Kai began. He looked away.

Max stared at him with wide eyes. Turning his blonde head he took in the sight of the mattress and blankets and a few odd belongings. And finally the small substitute for a Christmas tree. "Kai?" Max said questioningly, hoping that his suspicions were not true.

Kai refused to look at him, glaring at the floor. _'Don't let him find out. I'm fine here, I don't need anyone. I don't. I don't. I'm fine alone.'_ He thought furiously

Max stepped closer to him. "Kai, talk to me. Are you _living_ here?"

Black gloved hands closed into fists as his head rose to stare straight into sea blue eyes. "That is none of your business. My life is none of your concern."

Max's innocent face had a horrified expression, concern shone in the blue orbs. "But Kai… You can't carry on like this. You're practically living on the streets."

"I'm fine." Kai growled. "Just stay out of my business."

"No, Kai, I'm sorry but I won't." Max said with determination. "I can't live knowing one of my friends is living all alone in some weird substitute for a house."

Kai blinked. The word 'friend' it was so foreign to him. After all that had happened… did Max still really think of him as a friend? Maybe a team mate, but not a friend, never a friend.

"Kai, why are you doing this? How long has it been like this?"

"A while." Kai said vaguely.

"But why, Kai?" Max's eyes once again surveyed the small space.

The muscles tensed under pale skin, knuckles turning white. "Because I have no other choice. I've got nowhere else to go." Crimson eyes burned in anger. "Not everyone has loving parents that adore them like you, Max." He spat out.

Max did not take offence by Kai's words, merely stepped up to the other boy. "I know I'm very lucky, Kai. But I can help you. Come back to my house, you can stay with me. You can't be alone, especially not on Christmas."

"I told you. I don't care about Christmas." Kai argued.

Blue eyes turned to look at the little tree on the floor. "It doesn't look like that to me."

Kai also looked at his decorations and his expression softened. The cold, hard glare melted away to a hollow look of emptiness.

"Please, Kai." Max begged. "Come back with me. You don't have to carry on like this."

He turned to face Max, staring straight into his eyes. He looked genuinely concerned for him. The look gave him a sense of comfort. Maybe he wasn't as alone as he thought. "Okay." It was a quiet whisper, but it was all that was needed to make a large grin spread across the American's face.

Kai grabbed his duffel bag and stuffed the most important things into it.

"We can come back if there's anything else you need." Max told him.

Kai shook his head, sliding the bag strap onto his shoulder.

"Come on, it's cold, let's get back to my house." Max said, tugging Kai's sleeve slightly and pulling him on.

The walked back through the snow in silence. The first noise being when Max opened the door to the shop. "My parents won't mind a bit having you here. You can stay as long as you like."

Kai didn't say a word as Max led him up the stairs. As they opened the door, Judy turned to look at them.

"Max, there you are, honey." She left her chair to come over. "Oh, hello, Kai."

Max glanced at Kai before looking at his mother. "Mum, can I talk to you and dad about something?"

Judy followed Max's gaze toward Kai, who was staring at the floor. "Of course, Maxy. You know you can ask me anything."

Max led Judy over to where his father was sitting and talked to them both about the young Russian's situation.

"God lord, that's awful. The poor boy." Judy exclaimed, looking over at Kai who stood in the same position by the door. "Well done, Max. It's good you found him. He shouldn't have been living like that."

"Do you think we should take him to social services?" Mr Tate said.

"I don't think Kai would like that, dad. It's not his kind of thing." Max informed. "I fi know, Kai. He'd probably just run away."

"So what do you think we should do?"

"Can he stay here? With us?" Max asked hopefully.

Judy looked from her son to the other boy. "Well we can't just leave him living on the streets. And we could certainly feed another mouth."

"So that's a yes?" Max said.

"Certainly. The boys always such a loner. He could use a nice loving family." Judy sighed.

"Well he can stay with us." Max persisted. "Kai can do everything for himself, mum. You won't have to really look after him."

"I'm not worried about that, Max. I won't mind him being here at all. Kai's a lovely boy. He could be almost like a brother to you, Max."

"So he can stay?"

Judy nodded with a smile.

"Yay!" Max exclaimed. He bounded back over to Kai, who looked up at him. "It's all sorted, Kai. You can stay here as long as you like. Forever if you want."

Kai nodded somewhat numbly.

"Make yourself at home, Kai. It's your home too now." Max pulled him along. "Come on, you can share my room."

Judy came up to them and placed a hand on Kai's shoulder. "You're very welcome here, Kai. If you need anything, don't hesitate to ask. We're here to look after you."

"Maybe, just for a little while." Kai mumbled.

"No Kai, you can stay forever." Max assured. "We can be like brothers."

Kai looked over Max and his mother and Mr Tate, who now stood next to Judy. They were all smiling and acting so kind. He gave a small smile back.


	5. I can't forget

**Show me the meaning **

**By EpitomeOfMisery**

** Chapter V: I can't forget **

Kai lay staring at the ceiling, Dranzer clutched tightly in his hand. Crimson eyes moved to look at the blonde American sleeping in the other bed, before staring back at the ceiling.

Max turned over in his sleep, a small smile on his face, as always.

Kai faced away from him, examining the blue walls of the room. Sharp eyes stopped on the window.

Blue eyes fluttered open and he sat up, stretching. Swinging his leg out from under the covers, he stopped as he saw the neatly folded covers on the floor. That was when he remembered.

"…Kai?" Max called, searching the room for the stoic Russian. "Kai!" He cried, running toward the open window. Hadn't it been shut last night?

He leant out, scanning the street below. "Kai!" He called. "Kai?"

"Up here." A voice said.

"Huh?" Max exclaimed, turning his head upwards to see the thin figure sitting on the edge of the roof to his right. One leg hung over the edge, his arm resting on his other knee as he perched dangerously, though the blader did not seem concerned about falling as his eyes were closed. His hair moved slightly in the breeze, scarf fluttering lightly.

"Kai, what are you doing up there?" Max asked in bewilderment.

The slate haired youth did not reply, just sat unmoving. His eyes opened but he did not look at Max, just stared straight ahead at the city.

Realising that Kai was not about to get down, Max turned back into the room. He quickly changed, shoving his shoes on in a hurry.

He swallowed hard as he pushed himself onto the windowsill, leaning out and getting a tight grip on the edge of the roof. He moved his feet onto the edge of the window, pushing out backwards and holding onto the tiles with both hands. He forced himself not to look down as he slowly stood, facing the wall. He moved one foot further up the wall and pushed off, scrambling up.

Kai watched him as he pulled himself up, watching from the corner of his eyes, his head staying facing forward.

"Kai, what are you doing on the roof? It's dangerous." Max said, looking down cautiously.

Kai stayed silent, his eyes closed.

"Why don't we go back inside? My mum will make us some breakfast. It's cold out here too." Max tried to convince him.

"I came up here because it's peaceful." Kai muttered, staying still.

Max nodded, watching him silently. After a few minutes he spoke up. "I don't mind if you sit on the roof, Kai. I know you like to be alone. But just remember that you can anywhere you want in the house too. What's ours is yours."

Crimson eyes opened and he stared ahead, his face expressionless.

"Well…" Max started. "I'm going to get some breakfast. You can come and have yours whenever you want." The American moved onto his hands and knees, carefully, sticking a leg out and searching for the edge of the window.

Kai closed his eyes again, though he could sense what Max was doing.

The roof was still coated with ice and snow from last night, making it not very easy to grip. Max gasped as he lost his grip and slid down, only just managing to grip the edge.

He nearly fell back when pale fingers wrapped around his arm. The grip was tight and strong and easily held him until he found his footing on the window.

"Kai, you saved me!" Max cried, clambering in through the window.

In a single move, Kai gripped the edge of the roof with one hand, swinging himself in after Max.

Said American stood with wide eyes at how quickly and flawlessly Kai had moved. He could have easily slipped and fallen, yet he made it look so easy.

Kai walked past him silently, eyes closed.

Max ran after him, leading them out of his bedroom. "Hey Kai, thanks. I could have fallen then."

"Hn." Kai said simply, following the blonde to the table.

"Morning boys." Judy smiled at them over her shoulder, fiddling with breakfast ingredients over the stove.

"Morning mum." Max greeted.

Kai gave a nod of acknowledgement, his eyes once again closed.

Judy placed two bowls of noodles on the table.

Kai blinked. "You have noodles for breakfast?" He turned to Max with one eyebrow raised.

Max nodded happily, pouring mustard into his bowl. "I have noodles for every meal."

Kai shrugged and picked up his chopsticks, twisting the stringy food around them before raising it neatly to his mouth.

Max was already happily eating, sucking his breakfast up.

They both ate in silence, before Max set his bowl down with a smile. "Umm, I just love noodles!"

Kai gave a brief nod.

"So Kai, what do you want to do now? My Mum and dad have gone shopping for Christmas presents, so we have the place to ourselves." Max's smile dropped as Kai showed no enthusiasm and just sat, arms folded, eyes closed. He thought hard to think of something Kai would want to do. "You know, Kai. My dad lets me use any parts from the store downstairs to upgrade Draciel, so he wouldn't mind if you upgraded Dranzer too. There's no shortage of parts."

Kai's eyes opened and he looked faintly interested.

"C'mon, let's go." Max cheered, running toward the door and down the stairs.

Kai followed at a much more leisurely pace.

Max was already pulling down boxes full of parts, placing them on the floor. "We have hundreds of spare parts."

They both sat for ages, adjusting their blades. Max hummed and gave occasional comments while Kai worked silently.

The Russian stared at the box of parts, as he dug his hand into the pile, his vision blurred and there was a smaller, bruised arm taking parts out of a large box of parts.

_A slate haired boy of about seven sat on the cold dirt floor. A torn grey cloth in one hand, polishing the parts in the other hand, one by one. _

"_Work harder boy!" A voice hissed behind him. _

_Silent tears made clean streaks on the dust covered face, his eyes stinging from lack of sleep and a hard thirty straight hours of work. Constantly polishing beyblade parts, enough to fill a truck. He had nothing but an old rag to work with, but the job must be done to what was considered satisfactory. _

_But his grandfather seemed to have very high standards of what 'satisfactory' was. _

"_Stop that pitiful whimpering! Work harder or I'll make you do it over! These parts must be ready to be taken to the abbey by tomorrow." He gave the boy a sharp back hand before turning and walking away. _

_The seven year old did not look up, just continued working while trembling. _

_A sick smirk curved at the man's lips. "Merry Christmas, Grandson." He said, leaving the boy alone in the cold, dark room. _

Crimson eyes widened as he snapped out of the trance. His hands froze, the silver weight disk dropping from his palm.

"Huh?" Max blinked. "Hey, are you okay, Kai?"

"What?" Kai said, louder than he meant to. "Yeah, I'm- fine." He fixed a new navy attack ring to his blade before standing and walking back up the stairs.

Max blinked in confusion before running after him. "Kai, wait! What's up?" He stopped on the stairs when Kai did not reply. He watched as Kai walked up into the flat and out of sight, before following him and going to sit in his bedroom.

The older blader had already climbed back out onto the roof.

The air was bitingly cold. Light snow fell all around, turning the ground a crisp white. Soft flakes landed in his hair, on the bare skin of his arms and sticking to his clothes.

The streets below were empty, apart from the odd car. This was understandable as not many preferred to be out in the cold.

But Kai was the opposite. Though ice was the opposite too his element. The biting cold was barely felt on his pale skin as his inner fire warmed his soul. The comforting presence had been there as long as he could remember. His bit-beast's presence.

The phoenix glowed in his pocket, radiating warmth.

He slipped his hand in between the material, clutching the blade tightly in his palm.

He closed his eyes briefly, before re-opening them and looking at the street below.

He blinked.

For a minute… he thought he saw….

…. A man that looked like….

He rubbed his eyes, blinking at the spot. It was empty. It was just his imagination. Another paranoid fantasy that of his worst fears coming true.

Another part of his life wrecked by his Grandfather.

He looked down just in time to see Mr and Mrs Tate coming back in the door, arms loaded full with bags of presents.

It looked as if Max was going to have a good Christmas.

Did Max really want him as a part of it?

**A/N: **

**Okay, another chapter done. I got a few reviews asking if the least chapter was the end of the story, and as you can see it's not. So sorry if confused anyone last time. Anyway please tell me what you think of this chapter and I'll update as soon as I can. **

**More reviews might get the next chapter up quicker, you never know. **

**Oh, and I know its most definitely NOT Christmas anymore, but oh well. **


	6. Gradual Trust

-1**Show me the meaning**

**By EpitomeOfMisery**

**Chapter VI: Gradual Trust**

Max laughed at the Christmas comedies showing on the television, grinning madly, unlike the Russian beside him.

Judy walked over, placing two plates on the coffee Table in front of the teens. One plate contained candy canes, while the other held Christmas cookies, shaped to represent Christmas trees and stars. "Here you are, help yourselves." She gave them a smile before walking back into the kitchen.

"Alright!" Max cheered, sticking the end of a green and white candy cane into his mouth. He sat back, glancing to the side at Kai. "You can have some too, Kai. My mum made them for both of us."

Kai blinked at him before looking at the food almost wearily. Silently, he picked up one of the Christmas tree biscuits, looking it over before taking a small bite.

Max smiled. "My mum makes the best Christmas cookies! Aren't they the best ones you've ever tasted?"

"They're the _only _ones I've ever tasted," He said without expression, sitting back like it was normal to have never eaten the items of shaped dough before.

Max's eyes widened. "No way! What do you eat at Christmas then?"

Kai was silent for a few moments, before he replied. "Nothing."

"Huh? But surely you have Christmas roast and stuff? You can't eat nothing!"

The Russian shrugged. "I'd sometimes get a bit of fruit of something," he mumbled.

The expression on Max's face was nothing short of shocked. "A bit of fruit? That was it? It's Christmas, you're supposed to enjoy yourself and eat lots of sugar and chocolate," the American said as if it was a fact of life.

"I don't."

"Well, you can now," Max said determinedly. He sucked on the candy cane before grinning. "I can't wait, tomorrow's Christmas eve!"

"Hn," was the only response Kai gave, taking another small bite of his Christmas cookie.

Max awoke earlier than usual, but found that Kai was nowhere in the room. Guessing he was once again on the roof, the American decided to leave him be. He respected Kai's need for personal space and also did not fancy nearly falling two stories down either.

Dressing quickly, he headed into the kitchen, pouring himself a bowl of cereal and sitting down at the table.

It was no more than five minutes before he raised his blonde head to the sound of the door opening. Which was rather unusual for the Tate household at quarter to seven in the morning.

He was even more surprised when Kai entered, a shopping bag in his hand.

"Hey Kai," Max called. "Where have you been so early this morning?"

The Russian raised his head, slightly surprised at seeing Max up this early. During his time with the Bladebreakers, he had seen that he was always first up, far before the others. In fact he had never known any one of them to be dressed before eight.

Quickly regaining his composure, Kai walked through to Max's bedroom, quickly sliding the bag under his own bed, before Max had an opportunity to question of it's contents.

Meanwhile in the living room, Max had stood to follow after the stoic youth, when the phone interrupted him.

The American was forced to divert himself, picking up the receiver and regarding the caller.

"Hey Max," Tyson's voice chirped out from the other end. It seemed the ex-All star was not the only one starting early today.

"Tyson? No way, what are you doing up at this time?"

"Blame Daichi. He wouldn't stop pestering me and it's kind of hard to sleep with the monkey boy jumping all over you, so I decided to get an early breakfast," the world champion explained.

Max laughed at his friends' antics, twisting the phone cord round his finger.

"So anyway, Maxie, I actually called to ask if you were doing anything today."

"Today? No, I don't think so," the Draciel master replied.

"Great! Because I thought we could get the whole team together for a, like, mini Christmas party. I asked Kenny and Ray yesterday and they both agreed, but you know it wouldn't be the same without you, buddy."

"Yeah, you know I'll be there."

"Wicked! Now the only thing left to do is track down the grouch," Tyson laughed.

"Actually, Tyson, he's-" Max cut himself off, realising what Kai would think if he told Tyson he was living with max's family. The pestering world champ would want an explanation of why, and he knew Kai would flip if Tyson found out and started feeling sorry for him.

Luckily, the Japanese boy was already carrying on, whining about Kai's anti-sociability.

Max listened, barely resisting correcting his friend.

"Hey listen Tyson, I'll ask Kai, you never know he might come," Max cut in.

"Yeah and Daichi will win an award for manners. But you can try if you really want to," Tyson laughed.

Max giggled too, "Don't worry, I can be very persuasive when I want to be."

"Anyway, I'll see you at my house at one. And Kai, if the wet blanket agrees."

"See you there then," Max concluded, hanging up. He then turned in the direction of the bedroom.

He opened the door to see Kai sitting inside, cross legged on the bed, with his eyes closed.

"Hey Kai, there's a party at Tyson's later," Max informed.

Crimson eyes opened slowly, acknowledging the blonde. "Hn. And that concerns me in what way?"

"Because you're invited."

"And what makes you think I'd go?" Kai asked, his voice calm but cold.

Max's smile faltered. "Because, we're your friends and we want you to come."

Kai gave no response, jumping of the bed and stalking across the room, scarf flowing behind him.

"Kai wait!" Max called, stopping the teen as he reached the door. "Please come. It'll be a lot of fun and we might have some beybattles. And I-"

"Look, Max," Kai growled, cutting off the blonde. "You may enjoy Tyson and that other brat acting like a fool. But _I _don't have time for little kids' games. So for what reason do you think I should waste my time with you brats."

Max frowned, slightly hurt. "Because I didn't tell Tyson that you've been living on the streets because I'm _trying_ to help you have a good Christmas for once, Kai!"

Kai stopped, slightly shocked. He had opened his mouth to snap back at the American, but he closed it, shaking his head. He walked out into the living room, heading toward the door.

Max sighed, looking down sadly.

"What time?"

The blonde's head snapped up, surprised. He blinked, staring at Kai's back as the Russian stood in the middle of the living room. "Er…" he started dumbly. He shook his head, snapping himself out of the trance. "One o' clock at Tyson's place," he said brightly, smile lighting up his freckled face.

Kai nodded, heading out the door without looking back.

"Hey Max, glad you could make it, buddy!" Tyson beamed, opening the door to the blonde.

"Hiya, Tyson!" Max replied, removing his shoes before following his friend inside. He waved to Ray, Hillary, Kenny and Daichi who were already sat on the wooden floor. "Hey guys!"

"Max, good to see you," Ray smiled, motioning for the blonde to sit down.

The American took the seat, gazing around the bright room. "I love your decorations, Tyson. They look awesome!"

"Thanks!" Tyson beamed. "Grandpa and Hillary did a great job!"

"Well someone had to do it!" Hillary said, pouting slightly. "You and Daichi were too busy eating all the food that was _supposed_ to be for the party! Grandpa and I had to go out and get a load more!"

"Hey, if you don't want food eaten, don't leave it lying around," Daichi argued.

"It was _lying around_!" Hillary protested, glaring at the small boy. "It was all wrapped up in the fridge!"

"Well how were we to know it was for the party?!" Daichi huffed. "You should have put a sign on it or something."

Hillary growled. "There was enough of it! I thought you would have the intelligence to guess!"

"Well you were wrong!" Daichi said, clearly not understanding.

As the two began to argue, Kenny tried to break them apart, while Tyson only got involved. Ray sat, watching with amusement. Only Max noticed the door open.

"Hey Kai!"

The others stopped, looking up to see the Russian standing in the doorway.

"Hi Kai," Hillary said cheerily, smiling at the slate haired young man.

The young man didn't respond, crossing the room and moving to sit against the far wall.

"Same old Kai," Tyson huffed. "As antisocial as ever." He turned back to the other with a cheery smile. "So guys, it's Christmas, what shall we do?"

"Let's start on the food!" Daichi suggested enthusiastically, as everyone else sweat dropped.

"How about we check out some of the Christmas movie on TV to start with?" Ray suggested.

"Yeah," Kenny agreed. "I hear there are some good ones on this year."

"Alright!" Tyson cheered, leading everyone through to the other room. "Let's have a look," he said, switching on the set.

As they found one everyone liked, they all sat down on the floor. Kai moved to the back of the room, sitting in the corner, but watching the screen with hidden interest.

Max blinked at the Russian, getting up quietly and moving to the back of the room. He sat down beside Kai, giving the other a friendly smile.

The crimson-eyed boy blinked, as Max looked back to the screen. Eventually he leant back against the wall, folding his arms, a small smile on his lips.


	7. Scars

-1**Show me the meaning**

**By EpitomeOfMisery **

**Chapter VII: Scars**

Kai rolled his eyes, watching how Tyson and Daichi were drooling over a _commercial _for food on the television.

Ray laughed at the two, taking the opportunity to sneak the popcorn from beside Tyson. He offered the bowl to Kenny, who accepted politely, before the Neko-jin turned to give it to Max, only to find the blonde wasn't there. He looked around, smiling when he saw the American sitting at the back of the room, surprisingly next to their anti-social team mate.

"HEY!" Tyson shouted suddenly, noticing the absence of the popcorn bowl. He lunged at Ray, quickly grabbing back the snack, spilling several pieces onto the floor.

The Chinese teen merely laughed, watching Tyson's antics with amusement.

"Hey, Max!" The world champion called. "What are you doing back there with the sourpuss? Come sit up here with us, buddy."

Max blinked, before regarding his friend with a smile. "No thanks, Tyson. I'm okay here. I thought I'd keep Kai company."

"Why?" Tyson asked. "Kai doesn't even _like_ company." When Max merely smiled at him, he shrugged, turning back to the movie.

Max leant back against the wall, looking up suddenly as Kai stood. "Hey Kai, where are you going?" he asked, watching as the elder left the room. The blonde stood up and followed.

"Leave him, Max! I'm surprised he came in the first place!" Tyson called, his voice fading out as Max caught up with the Phoenix master.

"Kai! Hey, Kai!" The American called, stopping beside the other on the decking. "Where are you going, Kai? The movie isn't over yet and we haven't even started on the food or games yet."

The Russian didn't look at him, gazing up at the sky as the snow continued to fall lightly. "I'm leaving. They don't want me here."

"Of course they do!" Max protested, trying to be cheerful. "Tyson was only messing around. He wants you to stay. Really. You're our friend."

Kai didn't respond, moving to walk on when Max caught hold of his arm. "C'mon Kai, please don't go. It's not the same without you."

"Yeah, right, whatever," the slate haired youth said, trying to pull out of Max's surprisingly strong grip.

"Please, Kai. Just come back inside," the American said, pulling on Kai's arm.

"I said no!" The Russian snapped suddenly, wrenching his arm away, causing Max to fell back, taking the silver cuff around Kai's wrist with him.

Max fell back hard on the wooden decking, rubbing where he had banged his arm slightly. He stood back up with a sigh, holding his hand out to return the metal cuff to it's owner.

As Kai extended a hand to take the metal ring, the American stopped, spotting something on the other's now bare wrist. "Oh my god, sorry Kai! I think I cut you!"

The older jumped slightly, quickly retracting his hand.

Max blinked in confusion. "No wait Kai…. How did you get all those cuts?"

Kai didn't answer, turning around to walk away, but Max grabbed hold of him once more.

"Kai, those look pretty deep. How did it happen?"

"None of your business!" The Russian growled, shoving the blonde off and snatching back the metal cuff.

As he hastily reattached the band, Max's eyes were fixed on the scars. It suddenly hit him. His eyes widened, hoping he was wrong. "….K-Kai, did y-you… do those?"

The Russian gritted his teeth. "Leave me alone, Max," he said coldly. "Stay out of my business."

"But Kai!" The American said. "You didn't, did you? You didn't… cut yourself?"

The teen's silence told gave him the answer, as Kai turned and walked away, leaving the blonde American standing on the decking by himself. He watched silently as Kai walked away into the snow, his scarf blowing around him like a banner. The young boy's gaze didn't waver, even when his team-mate was out of sight.

"…..Kai…..why?"

He turned slowly, heading back into the room, more confused than ever.

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Slate haired shifted slightly in the cool breeze, the wind occasionally increasing to an icy blow, stinging at his skin.

The cold felt good. Numbing. It took away the pain. He didn't have to think if he was numb.

He focused on the quiet whirring, just listening to his blade spin below. It calmed him. Training distracted him from everything else. When he was blading, he only had to focus on Dranzer. Nothing else.

Crimson eyes opened slowly, as he gazed down at the blade spinning just below him on the rooftop. He sat on the thin fence around the building top, perfectly balanced, both hands gripping the metal pole securely.

"…..Max," he said softly, a slight growl evident in his voice. _He wouldn't tell them… would he? _

He called his blade back to his hand, turning as he stood on the thin metal railing. He stared out at the city, the cold wind blowing his scarf out behind him. The icy breeze stung at his skin as the wind increased.

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"Hey Max, what's up, buddy?" Tyson asked, sitting down beside his friend.

The blonde turned to the other, forcing a smile. "Nothing's up. Why do you ask that?"

"You just seem a bit down, pal." The navy haired teen grinned. "Hey, shall I ask Grandpa if we can start on the food yet?"

The American laughed, though it sounded slightly fake. "Sure thing. I'm starving!"

The blonde joined the others, as Tyson ran through to whine to his Grandpa about the food. It wasn't long before the teen returned, carrying several bowls and plates packed high with snacks.

"Okay guys, dig in!"

Daichi was predictably the first over, sitting crossed legged on the floor, surrounded by several dishes which were quickly being emptied.

Max chewed his noodles thoughtfully, glancing every so often at the door.

_Kai…. Why did you do it? How many times? What could be so bad that you would want to hurt yourself like that? I know you've had some hard times, but….. Did it really drive you to this? _he sighed, placing his bowl on the floor. _I just wish you would tell me what's wrong, Kai. _

The American stood, shrugging on his coat.

"Hey Max, where you going, dude?" Tyson asked, as everyone turned to see the blonde standing by the door.

Max forced a smile at his friend, one hand on the door handle. "Sorry guys, I just remembered my dad wants me back at the shop."

"I'm sure you can stay a bit longer," Ray said. "Your dad's shop isn't usually too busy around Christmas, is it?"

"He needs me to help out in the back. We got to tidy the house ready for Christmas day as well." The American pulled open the door, the icy wind instantly blowing at him. "I'll see you later guys!" The blonde called, letting the door slide shut behind him.

Max ran down the decking, toward the entrance of the house and out into the street, trying not to slip on the icy roads. He looked all around, bright blonde hair blowing over his face, framing his bright blue eyes.

"….Where are you, Kai?"

He set off down the street, in search of his stoic team mate.

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Dranzer sailed through the snow, cutting through the air with impressive speed. The blue blade tossed up the white flakes, spinning in a near perfect circle before running up the side of the building.

He stood braced on the fence, his legs spread evenly apart, never once shaking in the slightest. Perfectly balanced. Crimson eyes watched the blade's every movement, his launcher gripped in his hand.

Down below a figure squinted up at him, blue eyes widening in shock. "….Kai!" The boy set off on a run, dashing through the doors and into the entrance of the BBA and flying up the stairs. "….Please, don't jump, Kai. I'm coming!"

He reached the roof, breathless.

"…..KAI!"

The slate haired youth's head snapped up, turning to regard his team-mate. His blade stopped spinning as his focus was lost. He blinked in confusion as max approached him cautiously.

"….Kai. Don't jump, Kai. Please," the blonde said, his eyes wide and begging.

The stoic Russian just stared at him for a few moments, before he closed his eyes slowly. "I'm not suicidal, Max." His voice was even, not a hint of any emotion. No sarcasm. No sadness. No anger. Nothing.

The American stopped, standing in front of the teen that was perfectly balanced on the fence. He blushed slightly, looking at the snow covered floor. "…sorry, Kai. It's just that after I saw…. A-and… well just seeing you… up there… well…" the blonde trailed off, realising he was rambling. "I'm just worried about you, Kai."

"Hn," Kai responded, jumping down off the fence and landing a few feet in front of the other. He returned his blade to his hand, walking past the American haughtily. "You don't need to worry about me, Max."

Max ran after him, but stopped, seeing Kai wasn't heading for the stairs. He stared in shock, dashing up to the boy as Kai swung himself over the edge of the roof. He sprinted to the edge, leaning over the fence, his heart pounding.

He sighed in relief, seeing Kai walking casually along a slightly lower roof, his hands in his pockets, completely casual.

The American was slightly stunned, watching as the Russian strolled along as if it was normal to be walking on, not mention _jumping_ off rooftops.

As the teen disappeared once more, Max leant on the fence, his arms folded and his chin resting on his forearms. "I wish I could understand you, Kai," he muttered.

The blonde turned, heading back toward the stairs. As he headed back down, he thought over when he had noticed the cuts on Kai's arm. He just wished he could help the teen.

The memory of seeing those scars played over and over in his mind, until he got back home.

"Hey Max, you okay there?" His dad asked, seeing his son's downcast expression as he entered the shop.

The blonde pondered over whether to tell his dad, staring at the man's kindly face. "I'm just worried about, Kai." He sighed, walking over and leaning on the counter.

"I'm sure the boy's fine, Maxy. Don't worry. That boy can take care of himself."

Max nodded slowly, deciding not to tell his parents of his discovery. At least not just yet.

He headed back up to his bedroom, sitting on the bed, staring out the window at the gradually darkening sky. The snow still continuing to fall.

**Author's note**

**Two updates in two days! I got this up quick as a thank you for all your reviews:D Tell me what you think and I'll try to get the next one up as soon as I can. **


	8. Gradual Trust II

-1**You have no idea how much trouble I had getting this up. It was actually finished a while ago but my internet hates me! So anyway, enjoy! **

**Show me the meaning **

**By EpitomeOfMisery **

**Chapter VIII: Gradual Trust **

12:14...

12:15...

12:16...

Max sighed, sitting up in bed. "Where are you, Kai?" He whispered. The American slid out of bed, moving over to the window and staring out at the street below.

A light blanket of snow covered the ground. White lined every building and car, coating everything in an icy blanket.

Max breathed out against the frost covered window, resting his chin on his forearms on top of the windowsill. He watched silently as small white specks gradually began to float down from the sky.

"Where are you, Kai?" he whispered to the empty room.

Or supposedly empty. "……Try turning around once in a while."

The American blonde spun around so fast he nearly fell over. "Kai! Y-You came back! Y-You.." he trailed off, realising he was babbling.

The Russian stalked past him, taking a seat on his own bed. He folded his arms, closing his eyes in a calm manner. "What did you think I would do? Run away and never come back?" He said sarcastically.

"N-No, I just…I…." he trailed off, smiling and shaking his head. "I was just worried."

"You don't have o worry about me, Max." The Russian didn't move from his position, not even twitching as max climbed back into his own bed, giving a last smile to the Dranzer wielder, even if he didn't see it.

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Max woke to once again find the other bed empty. But the sound of a spinning Beyblade from outside instantly rid him of his concerns that the Russian would take off and leave.

He smiled out the window at the impressively quick moving blade, before heading through to the kitchen to make himself breakfast.

"Morning honey," Just greeted, watching her son with a smile as he moved over to the cereal packet. "Where's Kai?"

"Oh, he's blading outside," the blonde boy replied with a smile, pouring cereal into a bowl and splashing milk on top.

Judy frowned slightly. "He better be careful out there. It's not exactly warm out and no one wants to catch a cold just before Christmas." She sat down at the table opposite her son.

"It's okay," Max replied with a shrug. "Kai seems to be immune to sickness. We swear he's never been sick a day in his life." Spooning cereal into his mouth Max grinned widely. "Man! I can't believe it's Christmas eve already! It's come round so quick!"

"It certainly has," Judy said. "And your dad's still down there working in the shop!"

Max smiled. "You know how busy it is at this time of year. Everyone wants Beyblades. They make great Christmas presents so the store gets a lot of money for us to spend on _our _presents!"

Judy shook her head with a smile. "Life doesn't revolve around Beyblading, you know."

Max chuckled lightly. "Yeah, I know. But it's just so popular and it means a lot to me and my friends. Just look at Kai! It's Christmas eve and he's out there practicing! He lives for Dranzer, especially since he almost lost her in the fight against Brooklyn.

"It's good to see he's starting to become a bit more comfortable here," Judy commented. "He finally seems to be starting to let go of everything bad that happened in his past."

Max frowned slightly at that, remembering what he had seen the day before.

The image of those scars replayed over and over in his mind. So many questions unanswered. There was a lot he wanted to ask Kai, but there was one query running round and round his head. What could be so bad that Kai would want to do that to himself? Was his past really that terrible?

"Max?" Judy cut into his thoughts, standing slightly concerned. "Is everything okay?"

Max looked up, forcing a smile. "I'm fine, mom. Just thinking, that's all." He stirred the last bits of cereal round his bowl thoughtfully, once again thinking over the events of yesterday.

_Kai… Why can't you just let us in? _

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"Man, Just a few more hours and it'll be Christmas day!" Max beamed, flopping down on the sofa as Kai sat calmly beside him. "I can't wait to open my presents!"

"What about you, Kai?" Judy asked, sitting on the adjacent sofa. "Are you looking forward to Christmas day?"

The Russian shrugged. "I guess," he muttered.

Judy nodded, turning her attention to the television set as they room fell into a comfortable silence, with Max occasionally laughing at the Christmas comedies on the screen.

Kai leant back against the cushions, allowing himself to settle and for once deciding to give the television set some attention. He had to admit a few of the shows were fairly amusing. Though he would never show it, of course.

However, as he followed Max to the bedroom, a slightly smile grazed his lips.

Lying down on the spare bed, Kai looked up at he ceiling, waiting. He knew Max had something to say. Knowing Max it wouldn't take long for him to speak.

"Kai." The voice came sure enough. "Can I talk to you about something?"

The Russian sighed, closing his eyes briefly. "Is anything stopping you?" he asked.

The American blinked, looking away before stuttering awkwardly. "W-Why did you do it, Kai? It doesn't exactly make anything better… does it?"

"I don't know what you're talking about, Max." His voice was cold. Heartless. Like the Kai from two years ago.

"Yes you do, Kai!" The blonde protested, a slight ring of hurt in his voice. "I saw those cuts, Kai! I'm trying to help you. Please, just talk to me."

The Dranzer master sat up, glaring across the room angrily. "It's none of your business, Max!"

"Yes it is, Kai! I'm your friend. Whether you like it or not!" Max argued, sitting up in his own bed and staring back with shining eyes. "I'm not going to judge you. I just want to know why you would hurt yourself like that."

"What would you know?" Kai hissed. "Life was always so easy for you. All of you. The problems you face are nothing and yet you still all whine like brats!"

"But what about your problems, Kai? If they're so bad, why won't you let us help you?"

"Because it's my business."

"Well I'm making it _mine_," Max retorted. "Because if one of my best friends isn't happy, then I'm not happy either!"

Kai opened his mouth to fire back a comment, but it was lost before he could say it. He replayed what Max had just said over in his head. _He considers me one of his best friends? _

Max sighed, looking away sadly. "I guess if you don't want to talk to me, I can't make you." He closed his blue eyes briefly. "I would never tell anyone no matter what you said. But if you don't want me to know, I'll respect that."

Kai lay back down, facing the wall.

It was silent for a few minutes. Max sat still, staring down at the floor.

"I guess it's just become a habit I can't break."

The blonde's head snapped up, turning toward the older teen.

"I started in the abbey and I just haven't stopped since. Old habits die hard, I guess."

Max just stared in shock, not knowing what to say. Kai had trusted him? Kai had let him know about his past? Even if it was just a little, Kai had still let him in.

A small smile lined the American's face. It was odd to be smiling at such a serious conversation. It was the most emotion Max had ever seen from Kai, even if the words were spoken without feeling.

"But it's not impossible to give old habits up," Max replied, finally finding his voice.

"Hn. If that were true, do you really think I would still do this to myself?"

"Well…. Maybe now you could try… and I'll help you?" Max suggested, looking at the other teen hopefully.

Kai was silent for a few moments. "If you want to waste your time, go ahead. But I have no reason to cut myself at this moment in time."

Max blinked. "Well, that's good, I guess."

"I never do it when not necessary. Only when I have reasons to not be happy with, well, life really."

"So… you're happy, with life, at the moment?" Max asked.

Kai shrugged. "I guess. I have no reason not to be, beside your constant question asking that is."

Max couldn't help but smile. "I'm glad you're happy here, Kai. I like having you here. It's like having a big brother."

The American blinked, hearing a foreign noise from the other side of the room. _Did Kai just laugh? _

"Whatever you say, 'lil bro'."

Max's smile changed to a grin. He chuckled at Kai's comment and somehow he knew Kai was smiling too, even though he could only see the other's back.

"Hey! I've got an idea! We shouldn't go to sleep just yet! We could stay up and have like a sleepover. We can bring in some food and everything!" Max beamed. "C'mon Kai, it'll be fun!"

"I don't do _sleepovers_," the Russian replied, sitting up. "Late night Beyblade matches are not a problem, though."

Max laughed again. "We can't beybattle now, we'll wake everyone up." He thought for a moment. "We could customize our blades, though."

Kai shrugged. "You got any decent parts?"

"Sure! It's helpful having my dad run a parts store!" He stood up on the bed, reaching up to a high shelf. Max pulled down a large box, sitting back on the bed with a thump. "I got loads of parts right here! They're good ones too!"

Kai crossed the room and peered into the box. "Not bad," he commented.

Both looked up as there was a knock on the door. "Why are you two awake?" Judy called. "Get to bed!"

"Aw, c'mon mom," Max moaned. "We want to customize our blades!"

Judy sighed. "It's Christmas day in just under a hour! Do it later! Now go to bed!"

Max pulled a face, making Kai smirk lightly. "Okay, mum," the blonde sighed in defeat, placing the box back on his shelf as Kai climbed into the other bed.

Both lay down as Max clicked off the light. "Night, Kai. Merry Christmas!"

It was silent as Max closed his eyes to go to sleep.

"You've got another hour or so to go, Max, but Merry Christmas all the same." Kai's voice floated across the room, a slight teasing ring present in the usually cold tone.

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Hope everyone enjoyed that! I hope Kai wasn't too OOC. Please review and tell me what you thought. I will try to get the next chapter up soon!


	9. Meaning

-1**Thank you all for waiting patiently for this. I tried to finish it off in a happy way, so I hope you all enjoy it. Thank you so much to everyone who has reviewed this story and inspired me to continue writing it. I appreciate your feedback and comment. Don't forget to leave a last review too :P. **

**Show me the meaning **

**By EpitomeOfMisery **

**Chapter IX: Meaning **

Light footfalls padded across the carpet in the dark. As silent and graceful as a phoenix. He was done and back in under a minute.

It took the Russian little time to leave the bedroom, place the objects under the tree and be back in bed, without a sound.

"IT'S CHRISTMAS!"

The shout from the American resounded through the household, soon followed by the sound of footsteps sprinting across the plush carpet.

"Merry Christmas, mom! Merry Christmas, Dad!" Max shouted as he passed his parents door. "I'm gonna start on the presents!" He beamed, dropping to his knees in front of the tree and beginning to rummage through the many brightly wrapped parcels.

Kai looked up from where he sat, just behind the blonde, at the kitchen table. A soft smirk crossed his lips briefly, before he turned his attention back to the cup of warm coffee in front of him.

"Wow! All these are for me!" Max cried, separating a large pile of presents from the rest.

Kai paid no attention to the younger, as Max sorted through the gifts, dividing them up according to whom they were for. The Russian briefly pondered over the reason why there were four piles, but let the boy continue without questioning him.

Max pushed two of the piles to the side, one after the other. "Okay, there all mom's gifts and these are all for dad!" He stood up, bending down and picking up the last pile with slight difficulty.

The master of Draciel staggered over to where Kai sat, disposing the many parcels onto the floor beside the kitchen table. "Here you go, Kai! I put all your presents in a pile ready for you."

The slate haired youth turned to regard him with slight confusion. "My presents?"

"Sure!" Max grinned. "You didn't think _all_ that stuff mom and dad brought was _just_ for me, did you?"

Crimson eyes ran over the heap of gifts, before he placed his mug back on the table and stood up. "I can't except this," he said, tone as emotionless as always.

Max blinked. "What do you mean, Kai? Of course you can except it! They're _your_ presents! Mom and dad brought them for you! You can't have Christmas without presents!"

Kai regarded him silently for a few moments, before closing his eyes briefly. "Your family have done enough for me, Max. I appreciate the thought, but there's no need for you to waste your money on material goods for me."

"But Kai!" Max protested. "Stop being so polite and just except something off someone for once! We didn't buy them because we felt obliged to or anything, we brought them because we wanted to. Because you're a friend, but also because you're almost like a part of this family now!"

The Russian turned to face him. "….Part of the family?" He muttered, half to himself and half in question to Max.

"Sure! So what if we're not blood relations? Now come on, let's open presents!" Max beamed, running over and pushing his own pile over beside Kai's. He sat on the floor, pulling Kai down to sit with him.

The American quickly chose a small parcel, tearing off the paper.

Kai watched him for a few seconds, before a small smile spread across his face. He reached out, taking a medium sized square package and neatly stripping off the brightly coloured paper.

Before long both boys sat surrounded by random pieces of wrapping paper and an impressive pile of gifts each.

Kai folded each bit of torn wrapping paper and placed it neatly in a near perfect pile to the side. He then turned to look over each present in turn.

Max was already sorting through a selection of new Beyblade parts and deciding on which of his new clothes he should wear.

The American had already taken out Draciel and was currently unscrewing his old attack ring, to replace it with a new one. His hand slipped and the plastic piece dropped from his grasp, bouncing across the carpet. "Oh no!" Max cried, diving after it into a pile of wrapping paper.

The blonde sighed in relief as he picked up the green ring, before his attention was diverted by something under one of the larger pieces of paper.

"Hey, there's another gift here! I must have missed it!" Max beamed, picking up the rectangular parcel wrapped in dark blue paper. He looked over the package, his smile replaced with a look of confusion. "I wonder who this is from? It's different wrapping paper to the stuff mom and dad used."

Kai wasn't looking at him, sorting through his gifts and carrying piles of wrapping paper over to the waste bin.

Max tore away the paper, his eyes widening as he started at the box.

It was a plastic case with a glass lid, showing the contents of a brand new set of fingerless gloves, beside a selection of new Beyblade parts and an expensive looking green, easy-grip launcher.

Max noticed something on the floor, picking up a small white card with an engraved image of a phoenix in the corner. He read over the writing.

_To Max, Merry Christmas, from Kai. _

The American turned to his team-mate, staring at the Russian who sat with his legs crossed and arms folded.

"K-Kai… did you get me this…?"

Kai sat unmoving, his expression not changing in the slightest. "Hn. It says from Kai. That's my name."

Max blinked, before breaking into a huge grin. "Thanks so much, Kai! This is so great!"

Crimson eyes opened and looked at him with the usual stoic expression. "There's no need to thank me, Max. That is nothing compared to what I owe you for all you've done for me."

"Yeah, maybe so… but you didn't have to go out and get me something like this. I've seen these sets in they shops! They're really expensive!"

"Hn. I have a little money left over from tournaments. And now I have someone else providing my living essentials, I guess I saved up a bit."

Max beamed, jumping at Kai suddenly and enthusiastically hugging the Russian.

Hearing a slight growl, Max leant back, laughing sheepishly. "Sorry Kai. Got a little carried away there," he said.

Kai gave him a light glare, before allowing a small smile to show on his face.

As the sky gradually darkened, Kai tilted his head back to look up at the stars. A soft sigh escaped his lips. A sigh of contention.

Even he couldn't this new life had suddenly been presented with. Shelter. Food. People that were more than willing to take care of him and even treat him like their own son. Max's mom and dad were the closest he had ever had to parents. And Max. Max had become like a brother to him.

Max's parents had also loved the gifts he had brought them. They bestowed praise on him, insisting there was no need for him to go to the trouble.

But he had felt entitled to. He wanted to thank them for all they had done for him. The gifts he had brought were the best way. He could show his gratitude, even if his stoic pride didn't allow him to do so face-to-face.

"Hey Kai!"

The Russian smiled softly, hearing the voice call out just below him. He watched silently as Max clambered his way onto the roof, managing to pull himself up beside the phoenix.

"Man. It's cold out her," Max commented, rubbing his arms through the fabric of his winter jumper.

Kai gave no reply, his crimson orbs once again fixed on the sky. For once he had opted to wear long sleeves. A brand new black hooded jumper with the image of a phoenix across the front covered him. A present from Max's family.

He glanced at the American boy who was also staring up at the sky.

Max was right. They may not have been blood relations, but if he couldn't be a part of his own family of blood relations, this was the next best thing.

Snow gently floated down from the sky, a gentle breeze blowing around the two boys as they sat together on the rooftop.

For once, Kai let his barrier slip, a genuine smile lining the pale face. He didn't know how the others would react to finding out that he was living with Max's family, or what would happen next, but he had learnt one thing.

The meaning of a holiday he had never been able to experience before.

"…Hey, Max?"

The blonde turned, surprised to hear the other speak. "…Yeah, Kai?"

The slate haired youth was silent, his gaze fixed on the stars. "Thanks."

Max blinked, confused. "For what?"

Kai smirked slightly, closing his eyes briefly. The wind whipped at them slightly, throwing his scarf billowing out behind him. "You'll understand one day," he replied vaguely.

Max frowned slightly, shrugging as he turned to look back at the Christmas night.


End file.
